Letting Go…

003Caleb is off to college! He moved into his dorm on Friday. He is happy with his room and he likes his roommate. He shares a bedroom and bathroom with one guy and a common area (livingroom/kitchen/laundry) with another 5 guys. They all seems to get along well, which is great. So far, so good!

All that said, there was a moment. George and I drove up to the dormitory on Friday to see his room and meet his roommate. The sidewalk was crowded with college kids acting like… well… college kids. And I began to feel panic (I know it is a strong word, but there it is – p.a.n.i.c). I mean really, whose idea was it to have a bunch of 18, 19, and 20 year olds living together and making their own decisions?!?  I’m leaving my child here, with them?! I am not so old that I can’t remember what it’s like to be young. Ahem… anyway…. George reassured me that Caleb would be fine. And I told George he wasn’t going to college. Ever. I called my dad, because he too remembers what it’s like to be young. I didn’t really want to be reassured (I know Caleb is a good kid and he’ll be fine. Really.), I just wanted someone I could laugh with. And laugh we did.

Today is Caleb’s first day of class. His sophomore year has officially begun. Please pray for him as he starts this new and exciting chapter in his life.

As for me, I’m missing these two kids! But, I am feeling blessed. Blessed to have mothered them. Blessed by the amazing grace of God that covers all of my shortcomings. Blessed to watch them learn and grow and step into adulthood. Blessed by the time we had and the times yet to come.

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There is no ongoing spiritual life without this process of letting go. At the precise point where we refuse, growth stops. If we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul. It is easy to make a mistake here, “If God gave it to me,” we say, “its mine. I can do what I want with it.” No. The truth is that it is ours to thank Him for and ours to offer back to Him, ours to relinquish, ours to lose, ours to let go of – if we want to find our true selves, if we want real life, if our hearts are set on glory.” ― Elisabeth Elliot

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